


Burning With Optimism's Flames

by feverbeats



Series: Loki/Doom [2]
Category: Loki: Agent of Asgard, Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616
Genre: Asexual Character, F/M, Genderqueer Character, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-15
Updated: 2018-07-15
Packaged: 2019-06-10 23:24:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15302331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/feverbeats/pseuds/feverbeats
Summary: "So you remember, at least.""Yes," Loki says. "Of course I do. I'm still me.""No," Victor says. "You're a stranger to me. My Loki was old and bitter. He was sharp and vicious and sentimental. He wasn't some…twink."





	Burning With Optimism's Flames

**Author's Note:**

> It's a sequel to the Loki/Doom I wrote seven years ago (linked as a series)! It's Agent of Asgard fic! It's 2018 and I'm way late, but here we go anyway.
> 
> Thanks to Gwen for some of the Loki ideas and thanks to XTC for the title. [Playlist is here.](https://open.spotify.com/user/feverbot/playlist/01a4rhMkab4gjn2UdFIask?si=OJQ9Xoj6T_ePSozqnIdC8A)

**ONE: VERITY**

Verity Willis has her concerns about the Loki situation. There are flaws in her design. She can tell if someone is lying, but she can't tell when when people are omitting something. She can't tell when people tell lies they believe are true. She can't tell when she's asking the wrong questions.

But overall, she thinks she and Loki are a good fit. Maybe it's because she's never had a friend before, but Loki is pretty respectful and doesn't hit on her and seems to really need her around, so that's good. Sometimes Loki is a woman. Verity has started just saying _they_ in her head, because it makes more sense and seems more accurate.

Once in a while, she catches Loki looking for things that aren't there. They sometimes look at the inside of their left wrist as if there's something there, but there isn't. Not that Verity can see. That's another one of her limitations. Her power only works on words.

Once or twice, Loki asks her to stay the night. The first time she gives them a dark look and says, "Whoa, I thought we were really clear. We're just friends."

"Oh," Loki says, startled. "No, no, not like that. Just--It might be nice to have someone here."

So Verity stays. She's going to stay on the couch, but Loki turns into their female self, and Verity decides not to mind sharing a bed with them. They don't try anything.

In the morning, Loki, in an oversized t-shirt and no bra, says, "Is it me you don't like, or sex?"

"I like you," Verity says. "I just don't want to fuck you. Or anyone," she adds.

Loki nods. "I've known someone else like that."

"Hooray?" Verity says. She's a little annoyed, but it's better than telling her it isn't true.

"Do you want to hear a story?" Loki says, their eyes shining. There is something old and dangerous in their voice.

"I hate stories," Verity says.

"In the beginning," Loki says, "there was a chasm."

The story is about Loki's heritage, but it's complicated by the fact that they don't seem to _know_ their heritage. They say they're born of Odin, or born of Laufey. They talk about parents as if they're something you can pick and choose. They talk about their brothers, who sound fairly awful. They talk about Asgard and Verity can see why they left. Then they talk about Midgard, and Verity can see why they stayed.

"When Loki fell to earth," Loki says, their dark eyes shining, "he was taken in by a witch." (The pronouns Loki uses for themself are fluid and unpredictable.) "The witch ensorceled Loki and bound him with magical spells until Loki was indebted."

It's all like that. The whole story gives Verity a headache. Stories aren't clearly true or false, so her power doesn't work. Maybe that was Loki's plan.

At the end of the story, Verity says, "It sounds like you really wanted to sleep with Heimdall."

Loki stares. " _That's_ what you got out of my story? That?" Their hair is slowly shortening, as it has been the whole time they spoke. Their face becomes more angular and soon they look like a man again. Although Verity thinks it's probably not useful to think of them that way.

"That's one thing," she says. She's decided to keep the rest to herself. She doesn't need her power to the story is full of danger sign. Loki is all danger signs.

One night they're in Verity's apartment having pancakes. It's almost midnight. They often stay up late having landmines of conversations. It all comes back around to family almost every time, though Loki swears they can't stand to talk about their family.

Loki reaches over for the syrup and says, "Tell me about your parents."

"Ugh," Verity says. "There's not much to tell. They're divorced. I'm close with my mom and she's a struggle and a half. My dad, not so much."

"That all sounds very normal and acceptable," says Loki, who can only see their own problems.

Verity wouldn't say she trusts anyone, but she likes Loki, so she keeps talking. Talking about her stuff seems to soothe Loki, and she doesn't mind doing it. She tells them about how her mom wishes she'd get a boyfriend, but it's not worth explaining that interpersonal stuff is impossible and sex is stupid and anyway, maybe she likes girls. She tells them about how her dad has more secrets than Loki, and how he keeps certain rooms of the house locked, even now that Verity's an adult.

At that, Loki leans forward, their eyes bright. "Why is that?" Danger signs.

"Well," Verity says. "I'm not sure. I used to get into his stuff when I was a kid. He has a lot of old jewelry, and I almost broke one of his antique boxes when I was little. That's literally the most trouble I've ever been in."

"A box," Loki says.

"Yes," Verity says slowly. "Like a little chest. Why?"

"Did you ever touch it?" Loki asks, which is a strange question.

Verity remembers. When she was younger, she got into everything. She was always in her parents' room, and one time she got into the closet where her dad kept some of his antiques. She was maybe three, and the memory is hazy. "I dropped it," she says. "Because it felt so cold."

"Well," Loki says, jerking back in their seat, suddenly brisk. "Don't tell me any more. Just in case."

Verity doesn't want to know, so she doesn't ask. She doesn't believe she met Loki for a reason. Not in a grand, cosmic sense. But these conversations make her uncomfortable.

That night, she and Loki fall asleep on the couch, watching Netflix. Verity wakes up at three in the morning with Loki's head on her shoulder. Their hair is feathery soft, and they look very young when they're asleep. Verity moves them gently and goes to get a drink of water and take out her contacts.

When she comes back, Loki's awake. Their eyes gleam in the light from the television. "Verity," they say, "Do you care for me?"

Sometimes it feels as if the Loki she's looking at isn't the cheerful young person she's friends with, but the god from Loki's stories. "Yeah," she says. "I do. You're my best friend."

Loki relaxes. "That's probably safe enough." Loki qualifies everything so Verity can't call it true or false.

That's when they're both sucked into a magical portal.

**TWO: VICTOR**

Victor shakes up the pieces and tries to make sense of them. No matter how they fall, they don't add up. The tattoo, the ring, the bird, the child. The promises and half promises. The Italian restaurant, the night on the yacht. The venom in the cave and the battle with the snake. He thought he understood what they added up to. He was wrong.

Loki has turned himself into someone who doesn't owe Victor anything. To whom he is not bound.

Well, that's fine. Victor has other things in his life now. He has Valeria, who takes up a lot of his time and energy. Unfortunately, she's very bright. After Victor's first run in with this new Loki, she knows something's wrong.

"What is it, Uncle Doom?" she asks.

Victor is startled out his thoughts. He's holding a piece of one of his new Doombot designs, but he can't remember what he was doing with it. "Nothing," he says.

Valeria crosses her arms. "Hm," she says.

"It's a relationship thing," Victor says. "You would neither know nor care."

"I know about relationships," Valeria says darkly. "I know about my parents."

"Not like that," Victor says. "Less horrible. This was something different." Was it, though? Was it something better? Maybe it was a bad breakup and maybe it was all a lie. Who kills himself to get out of a relationship?

"Tell me about it," Valeria says. Skeptical. Good girl.

Victor sits back in his chair and says, "All right. He was a giant. She was a god. There were...promises exchanged. Till death do us part, was the implication. And he did die. And now he's back and we're--"

"Divorced?" Valeria says. "Is this about Loki?"

"Just listen," Victor says. He leaves out some of the violence and pregnancy, but he leaves in all the emotions.

At the end of the story, Valeria says, "You're being very sentimental, Uncle."

Yes, that's the problem. The problem is that Loki used to be, too, but he's turned himself into someone else.

And Victor should leave well enough alone. That's what a sane person would do, or someone who wanted to retain some pride. Victor's always had enough pride to go around, though.

One morning, Victor decides to bring Loki back to Latveria, just for a little talk. There was too much left unsaid last time. Victor was doing better with the evil future Loki than the young one, which is depressing to think about.

Unfortunately, he catches Loki's new friend in his net, too. They both appear in the middle of his lab, dazed and pajama-clad.

"Oh, hello!" Loki says jauntily, as he recovers.

"You owe me answers," Victor says. "I know that's hardly your forte, but you do owe me."

"Answers," Loki says. Victor can see him glance at the girl. "Verity, have you met Victor? Victor Von Doom, Verity Willis."

"Um," Verity says. "Okay. I saw him before. Are we being kidnapped? Oh, shit, no, _this_ is the witch boyfriend from the story."

Victor's heart lurches in his chest, hopeful and angry, but Loki says, "Oh, that. I suppose he was. Not now."

Victor paces around them, trying to keep himself calm. "So you remember, at least."

"Yes," Loki says. "Of course I do. I'm still me."

"No," Victor says. "You're a stranger to me. My Loki was old and bitter. He was sharp and vicious and sentimental. He wasn't some… _twink._ "

"I'm trying to change," Loki says, charming smile. "This just means it's working."

This Loki is so young, and so violently optimistic. He seems to really believe he can be a good person. He believes it so hard and so sincerely that Victor believes it will kill him before he even realizes it.

"Do you still have your tattoo?" Victor demands.

Loki looks at him blankly. Then he laughs and says, "Oh, that. No, not since I became a child. I've been written out of the Book of Fate, you see. I'm free of Ragnarok, and so it faded from my body. I must have known it would. That's the only reason I would have agreed to that."

Victor knows--thinks he knows--that these are words calculated to wound. They're not necessarily the truth.

"Lie," Verity mutters, almost as if it's a reflex.

Victor stops. "What was that?"

"Nothing," she and Loki chorus.

"It's a compulsion, sorry," she tells Loki.

Victor registers her name and has a thought. He strides to the one of his computers and searches. Verity Willis. D-7 superhuman. Ability to identify when someone is lying. Then Victor sees something else, and his heart skips a beat. He feels cold, destiny beating all about him. But that's what he wants. The old Loki, the one who wasn't afraid of destiny, was his.

"Can nothing change your mind?" he asks Loki. "Can nothing convince you that you haven't changed?"

"Not really," Loki says. Even the cadence of his voice is so different. "For my next trick, I'll shock everyone by being exactly the one thing they thought I couldn't: different."

"Are you even a Jotun anymore?" Victor asks, anger rising in him like ice. "I'll show you mine if you show me yours? A true face in exchange for a true face?"

"There are a lot of things I'm not, now," Loki says. He looks almost pained. Good. Let it hurt. Let Loki be what he was.

Victor strides the length of the room and back, trying and failing to harness his anger. Loki's name still burns on his skin, a rune that means _Liesmith_. Maybe it just means everything between them was a lie.

When he comes to rest in front of Loki again, he's trembling with rage.

"Loki," he says, "do you care for me?"

Loki looks at him, face blank and pretty. "I barely know you."

So Victory locks him away. The cell is the same one Victor trapped Loki in that first night. Loki shows no sign of recognizing this, and Victor burns.

He _burns_. They used to both burn, ice and fire, monsters hidden behind masks.

**THREE: LOKI**

Loki is hanging upside down in the cell, feet bound in red chains suspended from the ceiling. Above him--well, it's not quite a snake. But Victor probably didn't even have to buy anything new to create a device that drips acid on a timer.

Loki's eyes are shut, his face pale and pinched. The acid falls on his face 

"This," he says. "This is what I was trying to escape. You'd understand, Victor, if you had this kind of destiny." He shouldn't have used Victor's first name. He's slipping into old habits. It's hard to think through the pain.

Victor watches impassively from a high window. Loki can't tell what he's thinking.

"Verity, can't you--"

But Verity is already moving, dropping to her knees beside Loki. Her glasses case is in her hand and she has it open under the stream of acid, letting it pool in the case before it hits Loki's face.

With an unpleasant jolt, Loki sees the pieces of destiny fall into place. But at least the pain is gone.

"I held that bowl for you once," Victor says. His voice echoes into the cell through a hidden microphone.

"And now you've become the monster,"Loki says.

"What the fuck is going on?" Verity asks.

"Yes, Loki, what _is_ going on?" Victor asks. "You always end up like this, don't you? Cycle after cycle. So why are you running from who you are?"

"Doesn't take rejection well," Loki mutters to Verity. The glasses case is small. She's going to have to empty it soon. He wonders if it would be better or worse if he'd told her this part of his story. He was hoping it wouldn't come up.

"Has this friend of yours told you what her name is?" Victor is.

"I did introduce you," Loki points out, just as Verity says, "Sorry!" and splashes the venom across the floor. Two drops hit Loki's face before Verity positions the empty case under the flow again.

"Her middle name," Victor says, undeterred by Loki's cry. "It's Sigyn."

"What?" Loki says.

"So?" Verity says.

"No," Loki says. "Oh, no, no."

"What?" Verity says. "Loki, is this really what we want to focus on right now."

"It's all here," Loki says slowly. "The venom, the chains. You. Oh no, no. I can't escape it. Everywhere I go, my old life is still here."

"I don't understand," Verity says. "All that's here because Doom put it there."

"He didn't put you here," Loki says miserably.

Verity flings away the acid again, and Loki burns. When she's finished, Loki is pale and panting. Doom is gone from the window. "This is my destiny," he says.

"I haven't read any of the myths," Verity says. She's pale, too. "I have trouble reading that stuff. Fiction."

"I think you'll find," Loki whispers, "that it's mostly true." He pauses. "Sigyn was my wife. She held the bowl while the snake dripped venom on my face. Before."

"The snake? Your--? Shit," Verity says. She takes a deep, shaky breath. "I don't want to be your wife."

"Neither did she," Loki says.

They sit in silence, the only sound the drip of the acid into the case. Loki wonders if it will begin to eat through.

"If you asked to go, I think he'd let you," Loki says. "He's proven his point."

"Okay," Verity says after a minute. "I will."

Loki's heart sinks. Not only is he trapped by destiny, but Verity is leaving him. No more best friend.

"Doom!" Verity calls. "I want out! This is between you two!" She sounds authoritative. Loki is proud. Proud and afraid.

The door opens, but it's not Victor, it's the little girl. "He's going to leave you in here all day," she says.

"Any chance you could get us both out?" Verity asks.

Oh.

Verity dumps the acid again, and Loki screams. The girl tilts her head, looking up at the chains. "Okay," she says. "I don't think Uncle Doom is going to get his boyfriend back this way."

"You're right about that," Verity says.

Loki's not so sure.

As soon as Valeria frees Loki, she transforms into her female form and hugs Verity. "I really thought you were going to leave," she says.

"Nope," Verity says. "I actually lie a lot. Oh god, I really don't want to be your wife."

"You won't be," Loki promises, not caring if Verity hears it as a lie. Predictions can't be lies, surely, and they're still going to run from destiny as hard as they can.

They pass through the lab on the way out, and Loki scrawls something at the top of Victor's latest page of notes.

"What are you doing?" Verity asks.

"Nothing," Loki says. Verity doesn't even tell her she's lying.

They go home to New York, having missed the rest of the night. They both crash in Loki's apartment, after Loki washes the acid off. Cured up in bed with Verity, Loki is wide awake. A Sigyn she can't lie to. A Sigyn she can't seduce. That's a neat trick of fate, and she chooses to see it as a blessing.

This is Loki's secret. She is still the Loki who burned. She just burns with frantic, vicious hope now, running ahead of her destiny in hopes that it won't catch up with her.

Maybe it always will. Maybe she always kills Balder. Maybe she always gives birth to monsters. Maybe she always destroys Sigyn. Maybe she always lies and suffers and burns.

But maybe not. For now, Victor will go to his dungeon and find her gone. He will go to his lab and find a rune that means Ragnarok, or doom, written on his notes.

And this time, Loki''s not running alone. Verity's hand is in hers. She doesn't know who Verity is, whether she's a lost Asgardian, something planted by the Loki that was, or just a coincidence, but she knows they're together. And if Verity's father has the Casket of Ancient Winters, well, that's probably not a trap lying in wait for Loki to spring it.

Victor is still furious at her, probably. But that's all right. He'll understand eventually that it's a longer con than he could ever have believed. Loki's mind is full of plans and the future is wide open. Victor has a place there. They all do. Probably even Loki.


End file.
